his hands. “Yes it does. Because it was me.”
It took him a moment to realize he’d said the thought aloud. He forced his hands open, rubbing them down his stubbled face. By even considering leaving her memories intact he was behaving selfishly and, worse, not thinking at all as the future leader of the Paladin should.
It shouldn’t matter what she thought of him. That it did meant one of two things. That he was either turning into an egotistical maniac who had no place leading his fellow Paladin or that… shit… she mattered too much.
Tell your master, no one touches my woman. It’s what he’d told the demon before he banished it. At the time he hadn’t thought much of what he’d meant by those words other than, of course, the implied stop fucking around with me and mine. But now?
His woman. As if there could be a bond. Which was not possible. She was human. With almost three hundred years under his belt, Logan had taken human lovers before. Some gifted, some not, but none recently. And none of them had drawn out these kinds of visceral and primitive reactions from him. He ached with the need to curl up with her in his arms, feel her warmth sink into him, the beat of her heart, and shift of her ribs assuring him of her health. And they hadn’t done more than flirt over candy bars—and that had ended with an exchange of wary glares.
Logan had had pairings with humans—compatibility pairings, pairings from desire, some that were truly based on love if only in a very simple human form. But a full bond? A true mating where they shared every aspect of their body, heart, and soul?
Only one other Paladin had bonded fully to a human mate. And look what happened to him.
Insanity followed by a betrayal excused as revenge. That man sat by Lucifer’s side now.
Ganelon’s spiral into insanity had started before his mate’s death, though. His unyielding drive to “save” her turned him again and again to the path of darkness. But nothing he did worked. She still died. And though Ganelon seemed to accept it on the surface, deep within laid a barren wasteland of anger, hatred, and greed, those emotions eventually leading to the moment he fully turned his back on both the order and his God.
Ganelon’s betrayal became a lesson to all Paladin: Serve God’s children, but don’t become attached to the point where one could be compromised. And always, always, hold one’s duty to the order first.
Logan sat back on the bed, forcing his hands away from Jessica as he looked up at the stucco ceiling.
“Why? Why would You ask this of me?”
Chapter 9
Jessica’s dreams were filled with nightmares. Dark parking garages, men who turned into creatures right out of a horror flick, and a web of evil that smothered both light and reason. She couldn’t fight that sort of thing. Didn’t know how.
And it really pissed her off.
She thrashed out, striking at the dark web that encased her, determined to shred her way out of the paralyzing blanket of terror. Understanding didn’t have to be part of survival.
Hands grabbed her shoulders, hot air branding her face. “—kay. I got you.”
Not for long. She arched up, hands pushing against the massive chest above her, a war cry worthy of Xena erupting from her throat as she tried to get enough room between her and her captor to inflict real damage. The hands on her arms shifted, and like solid bands of iron they clamped around her wrists forcing her arms above her head. A man’s body pressed down on her, entrapping, leaving no room to maneuver. Except for her head.
Unable to pinpoint more than a vague outline of the man in the dimness of the room, Jess went on instinct. She jerked her head forward as hard as she could, pain splitting through her skull and blurring her already compromised vision as her forehead connected with her attacker’s face.
“Fucking hell!” The man swore, and counterattacked by closing that distance more. His mouth clamped down on hers in a
It took him a moment to realize he’d said the thought aloud. He forced his hands open, rubbing them down his stubbled face. By even considering leaving her memories intact he was behaving selfishly and, worse, not thinking at all as the future leader of the Paladin should.
It shouldn’t matter what she thought of him. That it did meant one of two things. That he was either turning into an egotistical maniac who had no place leading his fellow Paladin or that… shit… she mattered too much.
Tell your master, no one touches my woman. It’s what he’d told the demon before he banished it. At the time he hadn’t thought much of what he’d meant by those words other than, of course, the implied stop fucking around with me and mine. But now?
His woman. As if there could be a bond. Which was not possible. She was human. With almost three hundred years under his belt, Logan had taken human lovers before. Some gifted, some not, but none recently. And none of them had drawn out these kinds of visceral and primitive reactions from him. He ached with the need to curl up with her in his arms, feel her warmth sink into him, the beat of her heart, and shift of her ribs assuring him of her health. And they hadn’t done more than flirt over candy bars—and that had ended with an exchange of wary glares.
Logan had had pairings with humans—compatibility pairings, pairings from desire, some that were truly based on love if only in a very simple human form. But a full bond? A true mating where they shared every aspect of their body, heart, and soul?
Only one other Paladin had bonded fully to a human mate. And look what happened to him.
Insanity followed by a betrayal excused as revenge. That man sat by Lucifer’s side now.
Ganelon’s spiral into insanity had started before his mate’s death, though. His unyielding drive to “save” her turned him again and again to the path of darkness. But nothing he did worked. She still died. And though Ganelon seemed to accept it on the surface, deep within laid a barren wasteland of anger, hatred, and greed, those emotions eventually leading to the moment he fully turned his back on both the order and his God.
Ganelon’s betrayal became a lesson to all Paladin: Serve God’s children, but don’t become attached to the point where one could be compromised. And always, always, hold one’s duty to the order first.
Logan sat back on the bed, forcing his hands away from Jessica as he looked up at the stucco ceiling.
“Why? Why would You ask this of me?”
Chapter 9
Jessica’s dreams were filled with nightmares. Dark parking garages, men who turned into creatures right out of a horror flick, and a web of evil that smothered both light and reason. She couldn’t fight that sort of thing. Didn’t know how.
And it really pissed her off.
She thrashed out, striking at the dark web that encased her, determined to shred her way out of the paralyzing blanket of terror. Understanding didn’t have to be part of survival.
Hands grabbed her shoulders, hot air branding her face. “—kay. I got you.”
Not for long. She arched up, hands pushing against the massive chest above her, a war cry worthy of Xena erupting from her throat as she tried to get enough room between her and her captor to inflict real damage. The hands on her arms shifted, and like solid bands of iron they clamped around her wrists forcing her arms above her head. A man’s body pressed down on her, entrapping, leaving no room to maneuver. Except for her head.
Unable to pinpoint more than a vague outline of the man in the dimness of the room, Jess went on instinct. She jerked her head forward as hard as she could, pain splitting through her skull and blurring her already compromised vision as her forehead connected with her attacker’s face.
“Fucking hell!” The man swore, and counterattacked by closing that distance more. His mouth clamped down on hers in a
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