for him, and not merely my own lustful desires,
but the desires of my heart. It was almost infuriating how emotional I was
getting, waxing on in a sappy internal monologue of all the ways I craved his
presence, the look into his eyes and merely swoon like some pathetic
schoolgirl. I felt like a fool… and yet I’d never been happier in my life.
“But you meant it,” Becky
giggled, practically squealing in excitement. “You’ve got it so bad for him!
And not just in your pants!”
“Shut up!” I said, turning
toward her in a mock display of anger. “I don’t want to talk about it”
“Touchy tonight,” she said,
playing at being wounded by my outburst though I could see her grin still
peeking through her mask of feigned reproachfulness. “I guess if you didn’t
want to talk about all this lovey stuff, then I won’t tell you about my love life.”
“What?” I blinked, sitting
up slightly in bed as I looked across the room at her. “What do you mean?”
“I mean that I’ve met
someone!” she said, biting at her lip excitedly. “About two weeks ago.”
“And you didn’t tell me?” I
asked, feeling somewhat hurt for being kept out of the loop, thought after I’d
hid my relationship with Richard for just as long I couldn’t really blame her.
“What’s his name?”
“Greg,” she said, smiling
bashfully. “He’s the sweetest guy I’ve ever met, and he’s so good with computers. In fact, that’s how we met.”
“Through the computer?” I
asked, frowning slightly. I never liked the idea of online dating, especially
the layer of anonymity it created, letting practically anyone pretend to be
someone else. “Like, on a dating site?”
“No, stupid,” she laughed,
“I met him in class. My laptop had crashed right in the middle of a lecture,
and I thought I’d lost everything! But all of a sudden he taps me on the
shoulder from the next row up and asks if I need any help. So he takes my
laptop and before I know it he’s handing it back in no time at all with
everything back exactly like it was! And when I looked at the document that was
open on the screen it had his number on it.”
“Oh, my God. That it
possibly the smoothest, nerdiest thing I’ve ever heard.”
“ Right?! ” she exclaimed, unable to stop herself from giggling. “So I
can’t stop smiling all through class and the next day I called him, and we went
out on a date!”
“Becky!” I squealed
excitedly, “that’s fantastic!”
“I know!” she squealed
back, “I was so nervous at first, but it’s like every time I’m near him, I
don’t feel that way anymore. It’s like he knows just how to calm me down. And
the sex is so great!”
“You’re already having
sex?” I asked, my eyes going wide. “Since when?”
“Our third date,” she
mumbled, casting her gaze down toward her knees bashfully. “I didn’t think he’d
be good at it—he’s kind of an awkward guy most of the time—but I was so wrong.”
I couldn’t help but laugh,
covering my face to hide my own scarlet cheeks. I never thought in a million
years I’d be talking about my sex life, even with Becky, but I couldn’t deny
that it felt good to have someone who
knew the truth about what Richard and I were doing—especially someone who
wouldn’t judge us.
“I’m glad I have you to
talk to, Becky,” I said, relaxing back against my pillows, my arms up behind my
head. “I don’t know what I’d do if you weren’t there for me.”
“Well, I can’t say the
feeling isn’t mutual, Jess,” she sighed, smiling over at me as she too settled
back down onto her bed. “I’m just glad I have my best friend here with me,
otherwise I don’t think I’d be able to handle college.”
“Me either,” I whispered.
The following morning, I was sitting
outside of the campus café, enjoying the usual cup of coffee I liked to get
right before classes started. It was always quiet, with only the few students
milling about who made it a
but the desires of my heart. It was almost infuriating how emotional I was
getting, waxing on in a sappy internal monologue of all the ways I craved his
presence, the look into his eyes and merely swoon like some pathetic
schoolgirl. I felt like a fool… and yet I’d never been happier in my life.
“But you meant it,” Becky
giggled, practically squealing in excitement. “You’ve got it so bad for him!
And not just in your pants!”
“Shut up!” I said, turning
toward her in a mock display of anger. “I don’t want to talk about it”
“Touchy tonight,” she said,
playing at being wounded by my outburst though I could see her grin still
peeking through her mask of feigned reproachfulness. “I guess if you didn’t
want to talk about all this lovey stuff, then I won’t tell you about my love life.”
“What?” I blinked, sitting
up slightly in bed as I looked across the room at her. “What do you mean?”
“I mean that I’ve met
someone!” she said, biting at her lip excitedly. “About two weeks ago.”
“And you didn’t tell me?” I
asked, feeling somewhat hurt for being kept out of the loop, thought after I’d
hid my relationship with Richard for just as long I couldn’t really blame her.
“What’s his name?”
“Greg,” she said, smiling
bashfully. “He’s the sweetest guy I’ve ever met, and he’s so good with computers. In fact, that’s how we met.”
“Through the computer?” I
asked, frowning slightly. I never liked the idea of online dating, especially
the layer of anonymity it created, letting practically anyone pretend to be
someone else. “Like, on a dating site?”
“No, stupid,” she laughed,
“I met him in class. My laptop had crashed right in the middle of a lecture,
and I thought I’d lost everything! But all of a sudden he taps me on the
shoulder from the next row up and asks if I need any help. So he takes my
laptop and before I know it he’s handing it back in no time at all with
everything back exactly like it was! And when I looked at the document that was
open on the screen it had his number on it.”
“Oh, my God. That it
possibly the smoothest, nerdiest thing I’ve ever heard.”
“ Right?! ” she exclaimed, unable to stop herself from giggling. “So I
can’t stop smiling all through class and the next day I called him, and we went
out on a date!”
“Becky!” I squealed
excitedly, “that’s fantastic!”
“I know!” she squealed
back, “I was so nervous at first, but it’s like every time I’m near him, I
don’t feel that way anymore. It’s like he knows just how to calm me down. And
the sex is so great!”
“You’re already having
sex?” I asked, my eyes going wide. “Since when?”
“Our third date,” she
mumbled, casting her gaze down toward her knees bashfully. “I didn’t think he’d
be good at it—he’s kind of an awkward guy most of the time—but I was so wrong.”
I couldn’t help but laugh,
covering my face to hide my own scarlet cheeks. I never thought in a million
years I’d be talking about my sex life, even with Becky, but I couldn’t deny
that it felt good to have someone who
knew the truth about what Richard and I were doing—especially someone who
wouldn’t judge us.
“I’m glad I have you to
talk to, Becky,” I said, relaxing back against my pillows, my arms up behind my
head. “I don’t know what I’d do if you weren’t there for me.”
“Well, I can’t say the
feeling isn’t mutual, Jess,” she sighed, smiling over at me as she too settled
back down onto her bed. “I’m just glad I have my best friend here with me,
otherwise I don’t think I’d be able to handle college.”
“Me either,” I whispered.
The following morning, I was sitting
outside of the campus café, enjoying the usual cup of coffee I liked to get
right before classes started. It was always quiet, with only the few students
milling about who made it a
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