âyes, but not yet.â
In midsummer, I told Charlie that the dialysis treatments were beginning to wear on me. My appetite was decreasing, and my broomstick arms were looking silly in tank tops. He could tell I was getting anxious, so he suggested that we take a quick trip back to Baltimore while the hospital finalized our surgery date. We wanted to see Charlieâs newborn niece anywayâa nine-pounder who was quickly gaining more weight. âWe have to see her before she weighs more than you,â Charlie said. We rescheduled my dialysis treatments so they fit snuggly around a three-day weekend, and we took off due east.
I knew Charlie was excited to be back home, but I was a little worried about seeing his family and hearing what they had to say about him giving me his kidney. I knew they were jokesters, that the funny bone had passed down through the lineage, and that they protected members of their brood with their lives. If Charlieâs mother wasnât enough evidence of that, take, if you will, my memory of meeting Charlieâs dear Aunt Wendy for the first time. She had shaken my hand, and then put that same hand over Charlieâs chest. âIf you break his heart, I will hunt you down and I will hurt you,â sheâd said. At first, I was too scared to look at her. But when she got a riotous reaction from other family members who stood nearby, I knew she was using those words for comedic effect. Afterward, she slapped my shoulder and gave me a hug.
âOkay, I get it. Your family loves you,â Iâd said to Charlie. I had known how Charlieâs family felt about his heart, but I was afraid to find out how theyâd feel about me taking one of his other organs.
âDonât worry. You donât have to tell them,â Charlie said. âI will. Just follow my lead. Trust me, they wonât think youâre an organ harvester.â
âA kidney hog,â I said.
âThe Renal Reaper,â Charlie said.
In the living room of Aunt Wendyâs house, we walked into a boisterous welcome from aunts, uncles, and cousins waiting in line to bear-hug Charlie and gently wrap their arms around me.
âYou look well,â Aunt Wendy said to me, looking at my face carefully. I wanted to believe her, but I knew that I was tired from the flight and probably looked so. Charlieâs grandmother stood behind me and brushed my hair with her fingers.
âHi, Grandma!â I said, turning around.
âLook at that hair. Such beautiful black hair. Such pretty straight hair,â she said. âCome look at this, Wimpy.â She called Charlieâs grandfather over, and Pop, the bounding octogenarian, came to give me a hug.
âYeah. Pretty girl, ainât she? You still got that pretty hair, too, Holly. Feel it!â Pop put Grandmaâs shaky hand up to her head. Charlieâs grandmother was older than Pop, and not quite as quick as he was anymore. I was happy she remembered me. I watched the two of them as they remembered what she looked like years ago, her hair curly and less gray. Pop eased his arm around her as he escorted her back to the couch, and I could see where Charlie got his charm.
Charlie and I lingered around the party separately, but I always kept one eye on his location, just in case someone were to ask me about the transplant. I wasnât sure how Iâd respond; I was hoping that it wouldnât come up at all. I was hoping that we could explain our little exchange after it had happened, after both of us were in the clear. But it never came up, and I spent a large part of the afternoon holding Charlieâs niece Genevieve, a soft, sleepy bundle impervious to Charlieâs loud relatives. She burped in her sleep, wriggled in my hands, and tried to suck on the edge of my collar. She was the first thing that Iâd held in a while that was warm and alive and full of life. I was staring at her tiny nose when I heard Charlie
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