and the guilt, trying to assure
herself that she had done the right thing, the only thing she could do under the
circumstances. A wife had so little power, she was obliged to use whatever means
came to hand.
But her own sense of honor would not let her soothe her anxiety with such a
rationale.
Sophy awoke on the third morning after her fictitious wedding night knowing she
could not continue the charade another day, let alone the remainder of the three
months.
She had never felt so awful in her entire life. Julian's self-chastisement was a
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terrible responsibility for her to bear. It was obvious he was berating himself
savagely for what he thought he had done. The fact that he had done nothing at
all was making Sophy feel even more guilty than he did.
She downed the tea her maid had brought, set the cup back in its saucer with a
loud crash and pushed back the covers.
"My, what a lovely day, ma'am. Will you be riding after breakfast?"
"Yes, Mary, I will. Please send someone to ask Lord Ravenwood if he would care
to join me, will you?"
"Oh, I don't think there will be any doubt about his lordship joinin' you," Mary
said with a cheeky grin. "That man would accept an invitation to go all the way
to America with you, if you asked him. The staff is enjoyin' the sight to no
end, you know."
"Enjoying what sight?"
"Watchin' him fall all over himself tryin' to please you. Never seen the like.
Reckon his lordship is thankin' his lucky stars he's got himself a wife who's
very different from that witch he married the first time."
"Mary!"
"Sorry, ma'am. But you know as well as I do what they used to say about her back
home in the village. Tweren't no secret. She was a wild one, she was. The brown
or blue habit, my lady?"
"The new brown habit, I think, Mary. And that will be quite enough about the
first Lady Ravenwood." Sophy spoke with what she hoped was a proper firmness.
She did not want to hear about her predecessor today. The guilt she was
suffering was causing her to wonder if, once he learned the truth, Julian would
conclude she was very much like his first wife in certain scheming ways.
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An hour later she found Julian waiting for her in the front hall. He looked very
much at ease in his elegant riding clothes. The snug, light-colored breeches,
knee-high boots, and close-fitting coat emphasized the latent power in his
figure.
Julian smiled as Sophy came down the stairs. He held aloft a small basket. "I
had Cook pack us a picnic lunch. Thought we could explore the old castle ruin we
spotted on the hill overlooking the river. Does that appeal to you, madam?" He
came forward to take her arm.
"That was very thoughtful of you, Julian," Sophy said humbly, striving to
maintain a smile. His anxiousness to please her was touching and it only served
to make her feel even more miserable.
"Have your maid run upstairs and fetch one of those lamentable books of yours. I
can tolerate anything but the Wollstonecraft. I've picked out something from the
library for myself. Who knows? If the sun stays out we may want to spend the
afternoon reading under a tree somewhere along the way."
Her heart leapt for an instant. "That sounds lovely, my lord." Then reality
returned. Julian would not be in any mood to sit reading with her under a tree
in some leafy glade after she told him the awful truth.
He led her outside into the bright Spring sunshine. Two horses stood saddled and
waiting, a blood bay gelding and Angel. Grooms stood at their heads. Julian
watched Sophy's face carefully as he slid his hands around her waist and lifted
her into the saddle. He looked relieved when she did not flinch at his touch.
"I'm glad you felt up to riding again today," Julian said as he vaulted into his
saddle and took the reins. "I've missed our morning treks these
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