operating table covered in dust. The windows blow out as though in a great wind, and the air is full of glass.
Then the hospital changes, and it becomes modern but empty, and I am running down the halls, searching, searching for the right room, the room where he should be, but I can’t find it, and all the doors fly open around me, the floor dropping away beneath my feet, and the whole world is full of holes.
.9.
S aturday.
I wake up full of cobwebs and strange, creeping feelings, the remnants of my dream. It’s a struggle to open my eyes and to breathe, to expel the nervous thoughts scrabbling around in my brain.
When I finally get my eyes open, I roll over and check my text messages. There’s one from Daniel.
Ten o’clock?
I check the time. It’s nine thirty. Ugh. This is because I went to bed at a reasonable time last night. Exploring the old hospital had left me drained, and I went to bed at midnight. Now I was awake in the morning. On a Saturday.
If I had it my way, I’d wake up at two in the afternoon every day, but I’ll settle for weekends. Already I can tell pulling out of my death spiral is going to put a serious kink in my schedule. I text him back. Ten is fine. Thanks.
Then I roll out of bed.
Tanya’s still sleeping, so I slip down the hall and take a quick shower before trying to silently gather all the materials I need for my classes. When I’m ready, I haul the whole lot of it down the stairs and into the lounge across from the kitchen. One advantage of waking up early, I suppose, is that I get to claim the whole table to myself. I leave my shit there and wander into the kitchen.
Alice is there. “Hey,” she says. She’s making herself some cereal, and my stomach growls hungrily. She notices. “You want some?” she asks.
I shake my head. “I think I have some Chef Boyardee up in the cabinet.”
“For breakfast?”
“I usually don’t eat breakfast on the weekends. It’s usually my lunch.”
She nods. “So what are you doing up so early?”
“Daniel’s coming over to help me study for midterms.” I open one of the cabinets and peruse the shelf with my name on it. Just my luck, beef ravioli. Awesome. I pull the can down, grab the little saucepan that I think I may have accidentally stolen from someone last year, and set about cooking my breakfast.
“Daniel, huh? He seemed pretty cool.” Alice is still standing in the kitchen, leaning against the counter and shoveling Cocoa Puffs in her face as she watches me. “Where’d you find that guy?”
I’m not sure how to answer that. “My holocaust class.”
“Sounds depressing,” she says.
“It is.”
“Are you guys dating or something?”
I press my lips together. “No. He’s sort of... mentoring me.”
She laughs. “Mentoring. Right.”
I roll my eyes at her. “It’s not like that. Trust me.”
“Okay,” she says. “I trust you. So did you have fun yesterday? You were kind of quiet on the ride home.”
I’d been driving while Daniel had shared his photos with Alice and Jibril, but she’s sort of right. The hospital had left me with a strange feeling, and it made me quiet and contemplative. It stirred up thoughts I wished would stay buried. “Just thinking,” I say. “But I did have fun, I guess. I mean, I’d like to do it again, definitely.”
She brightens up at that. “Really? That’s awesome! We should do it as a regular weekend thing!”
I’m not sure I’m ready to commit that far, but before I can answer someone knocks on the front door of the house. I still have ten minutes to eat my breakfast, so I let Alice answer it.
I’m just pulling my canned ravioli off the stove when Daniel walks in. He takes one look at the pan in my hand and shakes his head.
I scowl at him. “You have a better idea?”
“Eggs?” he suggests. “Toast?”
I laugh at that. “I don’t usually have breakfast. This is my lunch. I’m just eating it early.” I grab one of my spoons from my shelf and begin
Then the hospital changes, and it becomes modern but empty, and I am running down the halls, searching, searching for the right room, the room where he should be, but I can’t find it, and all the doors fly open around me, the floor dropping away beneath my feet, and the whole world is full of holes.
.9.
S aturday.
I wake up full of cobwebs and strange, creeping feelings, the remnants of my dream. It’s a struggle to open my eyes and to breathe, to expel the nervous thoughts scrabbling around in my brain.
When I finally get my eyes open, I roll over and check my text messages. There’s one from Daniel.
Ten o’clock?
I check the time. It’s nine thirty. Ugh. This is because I went to bed at a reasonable time last night. Exploring the old hospital had left me drained, and I went to bed at midnight. Now I was awake in the morning. On a Saturday.
If I had it my way, I’d wake up at two in the afternoon every day, but I’ll settle for weekends. Already I can tell pulling out of my death spiral is going to put a serious kink in my schedule. I text him back. Ten is fine. Thanks.
Then I roll out of bed.
Tanya’s still sleeping, so I slip down the hall and take a quick shower before trying to silently gather all the materials I need for my classes. When I’m ready, I haul the whole lot of it down the stairs and into the lounge across from the kitchen. One advantage of waking up early, I suppose, is that I get to claim the whole table to myself. I leave my shit there and wander into the kitchen.
Alice is there. “Hey,” she says. She’s making herself some cereal, and my stomach growls hungrily. She notices. “You want some?” she asks.
I shake my head. “I think I have some Chef Boyardee up in the cabinet.”
“For breakfast?”
“I usually don’t eat breakfast on the weekends. It’s usually my lunch.”
She nods. “So what are you doing up so early?”
“Daniel’s coming over to help me study for midterms.” I open one of the cabinets and peruse the shelf with my name on it. Just my luck, beef ravioli. Awesome. I pull the can down, grab the little saucepan that I think I may have accidentally stolen from someone last year, and set about cooking my breakfast.
“Daniel, huh? He seemed pretty cool.” Alice is still standing in the kitchen, leaning against the counter and shoveling Cocoa Puffs in her face as she watches me. “Where’d you find that guy?”
I’m not sure how to answer that. “My holocaust class.”
“Sounds depressing,” she says.
“It is.”
“Are you guys dating or something?”
I press my lips together. “No. He’s sort of... mentoring me.”
She laughs. “Mentoring. Right.”
I roll my eyes at her. “It’s not like that. Trust me.”
“Okay,” she says. “I trust you. So did you have fun yesterday? You were kind of quiet on the ride home.”
I’d been driving while Daniel had shared his photos with Alice and Jibril, but she’s sort of right. The hospital had left me with a strange feeling, and it made me quiet and contemplative. It stirred up thoughts I wished would stay buried. “Just thinking,” I say. “But I did have fun, I guess. I mean, I’d like to do it again, definitely.”
She brightens up at that. “Really? That’s awesome! We should do it as a regular weekend thing!”
I’m not sure I’m ready to commit that far, but before I can answer someone knocks on the front door of the house. I still have ten minutes to eat my breakfast, so I let Alice answer it.
I’m just pulling my canned ravioli off the stove when Daniel walks in. He takes one look at the pan in my hand and shakes his head.
I scowl at him. “You have a better idea?”
“Eggs?” he suggests. “Toast?”
I laugh at that. “I don’t usually have breakfast. This is my lunch. I’m just eating it early.” I grab one of my spoons from my shelf and begin
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