Best Friend's Brother #4 (Best Friend's Brother Romance Series - Book #4) by Alycia Taylor Page B
Authors: Alycia Taylor
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make things
right. Somehow, I’m going to fix this. I’d give her a day…or two, and then I
would go talk to her and tell her how I feel.
CHAPTER
TWO
ALEXA
I drove home from Ian’s with my head spinning. I was
growing so tired of being pulled in so many different directions. My best
friend is dead. I met a guy who I really, really like…and I just can’t seem to
make it work with him. Ian’s not a bad guy. He’s just the opposite as a matter
of fact. He’s kind of an enigma. He spends a lot of time alone, yet he’s
perfectly comfortable around people. He rebelled a lot when he was a kid…yet he
has a great relationship with his parents. He’s an animal in the octagon. Yet
he’s sweet and gentle in bed. He says he wants nothing to do with his
ex-girlfriend and yet she keeps popping up in our lives. Since I’d started
seeing him he’s provoked so many different emotions inside of me, more than
anyone else ever had. I’m sure it has a lot to do with the way we came
together, already in emotional turmoil. We were both dealing with our grief and
it just seemed so much easier to deal with it together instead…maybe that’s
where we went wrong. Maybe we should have done that separately before we got
together and then dating would be going more smoothly. Maybe there are too many
emotions tangled up and maybe it was going to be impossible to untangle them
and decide where grief began and our feelings for each other started. Or maybe
there are no real feelings for each other. Maybe it’s our minds’ ways of trying
to compensate for the alternative…the emotional hell of remembering that Emma
was dead every minute of the day.
By the time I got out of the car and headed into the
house I was beginning to wonder if maybe it would be easier to straighten my
head out if I just concentrated on me for a while. Maybe I should go out and do something fun that had nothing to do with Ian or anyone
else. Maybe I should have stayed at school.
I walked in the front door and Dad said, “Is that
you, Alexa?” I almost laughed. I’m not sure who else he thought it might be,
and it reinforced that maybe I should have gone back to school. Since I’d been
home it was almost like mine and Dad’s relationship had reverted back to what
it was when I was a teenager.
“Yeah Dad, it’s me.”
“Come on in the kitchen, I was just making a
sandwich. Do you want one?”
I went into the kitchen. He had out almost every
condiment we owned as well as all of the lunchmeat, a head of lettuce, tomato,
onion and avocado. I smiled, “What kind of sandwich are you making?”
“It’s my version of the club…minus the bacon,
unfortunately. I forgot to buy some when I went grocery shopping. But that’s
okay. I have several different kinds of meat here.”
I wish I could care about the meat on a club
sandwich. If I did, that would mean that things were back to normal. I’m not
even sure what that was anymore. I sat down at the table and he asked me where
I’d been.
“Hanging out with Ian,” I said. He made a face, but
he didn’t say anything. I guess it was different from when I was in high
school. Back then, he never would have missed an opportunity to tell me what
was wrong with the guy I was dating. I think it was what made me be more
judgmental than I should be. I was always looking for something to be wrong. In
spite of that, I wondered if I should talk to him and see what his take was on
everything that had been going on. I thought maybe I already knew what he was
going to say. He was going to tell me that I should stay away from Ian. He
would give me a list of reasons why and tell me all of the things that were
wrong with him and then he would say, “It’s
not that I don’t like him, it’s just that he’s not what I want for you.”
“Dad, I really like Ian.” I told him. I was goading
him, sort of. I wanted his advice and yet I didn’t. What I really wanted was
for him to say, “Oh, Ian! He’s a great
right. Somehow, I’m going to fix this. I’d give her a day…or two, and then I
would go talk to her and tell her how I feel.
CHAPTER
TWO
ALEXA
I drove home from Ian’s with my head spinning. I was
growing so tired of being pulled in so many different directions. My best
friend is dead. I met a guy who I really, really like…and I just can’t seem to
make it work with him. Ian’s not a bad guy. He’s just the opposite as a matter
of fact. He’s kind of an enigma. He spends a lot of time alone, yet he’s
perfectly comfortable around people. He rebelled a lot when he was a kid…yet he
has a great relationship with his parents. He’s an animal in the octagon. Yet
he’s sweet and gentle in bed. He says he wants nothing to do with his
ex-girlfriend and yet she keeps popping up in our lives. Since I’d started
seeing him he’s provoked so many different emotions inside of me, more than
anyone else ever had. I’m sure it has a lot to do with the way we came
together, already in emotional turmoil. We were both dealing with our grief and
it just seemed so much easier to deal with it together instead…maybe that’s
where we went wrong. Maybe we should have done that separately before we got
together and then dating would be going more smoothly. Maybe there are too many
emotions tangled up and maybe it was going to be impossible to untangle them
and decide where grief began and our feelings for each other started. Or maybe
there are no real feelings for each other. Maybe it’s our minds’ ways of trying
to compensate for the alternative…the emotional hell of remembering that Emma
was dead every minute of the day.
By the time I got out of the car and headed into the
house I was beginning to wonder if maybe it would be easier to straighten my
head out if I just concentrated on me for a while. Maybe I should go out and do something fun that had nothing to do with Ian or anyone
else. Maybe I should have stayed at school.
I walked in the front door and Dad said, “Is that
you, Alexa?” I almost laughed. I’m not sure who else he thought it might be,
and it reinforced that maybe I should have gone back to school. Since I’d been
home it was almost like mine and Dad’s relationship had reverted back to what
it was when I was a teenager.
“Yeah Dad, it’s me.”
“Come on in the kitchen, I was just making a
sandwich. Do you want one?”
I went into the kitchen. He had out almost every
condiment we owned as well as all of the lunchmeat, a head of lettuce, tomato,
onion and avocado. I smiled, “What kind of sandwich are you making?”
“It’s my version of the club…minus the bacon,
unfortunately. I forgot to buy some when I went grocery shopping. But that’s
okay. I have several different kinds of meat here.”
I wish I could care about the meat on a club
sandwich. If I did, that would mean that things were back to normal. I’m not
even sure what that was anymore. I sat down at the table and he asked me where
I’d been.
“Hanging out with Ian,” I said. He made a face, but
he didn’t say anything. I guess it was different from when I was in high
school. Back then, he never would have missed an opportunity to tell me what
was wrong with the guy I was dating. I think it was what made me be more
judgmental than I should be. I was always looking for something to be wrong. In
spite of that, I wondered if I should talk to him and see what his take was on
everything that had been going on. I thought maybe I already knew what he was
going to say. He was going to tell me that I should stay away from Ian. He
would give me a list of reasons why and tell me all of the things that were
wrong with him and then he would say, “It’s
not that I don’t like him, it’s just that he’s not what I want for you.”
“Dad, I really like Ian.” I told him. I was goading
him, sort of. I wanted his advice and yet I didn’t. What I really wanted was
for him to say, “Oh, Ian! He’s a great
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